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wife. mom. adjunct professor. we homeschool. i'm a little bit OCD. i love math. bright colors and geometric designs make me drool. we live with a medical rarity, and Jesus saved his life. through that, Jesus is changing us. The american dream and status quo is overrated...and sometimes just plain wrong. our lives, our family, our careers, our faith are all now filtered through a new lens-- thank you Jesus. welcome to our crazy. feel free to take some of it with you, we have plenty to go around.
It's not the load that breaks you down; it's the way you carry it.
-- Lena Horne

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.-- Jesus Christ

Monday, November 21, 2016

And this time baby makes SIX.

 2:24 AM I woke. Wondered if this was it. We had had a few weeks of labor symptoms, and even had our midwife come out on election night  because we were suspicious that labor was maybe coming that day. She graciously spend the night, even though it turned out to be a false alarm… So at 2:24 am on November 14, I was hesitant to commit to the idea of labor, especially because the date happened to be your due date. Who's born on their due date?! Your mama didn't pay mind to that  date her entire pregnancy because babies come when they're ready. The night before, your daddy had rubbed my feet while your brothers and I watched Christmas movies. That evening I did the Miles Circuit to help you be in an optimal position, per my Midwife's suggestion, which I had forgotten until that day.
 When I woke early that morning, or in the middle of the night, I laid in bed a bit then walked around in the quiet. I was cold, so wrapped up in a blanket and bounced a bit on the birth ball. I was cramping, and was thinking about waking daddy… Ridge is not a great sleeper presently, and he walked by and we talked for a bit. I then went to the bathroom  and decided this definitely was it… I woke dad (it took some loud whispering) at 3:15 AM and then we went in the living room and I called Dawn, my midwife. Contractions were coming every 3 to 5 minutes and with Arrow arriving so rapidly I didn't want to risk not getting our birth team there in time. Dawn headed our way and dad decided to take a quick shower. At that time, I was pretty convinced this wasn't a false alarm, so I called Tavia, our photographer, and Brandy, our midwife assistant, and everyone was headed our way.   Nana had been called after Dawn, to go ahead and come tend to the brothers. I told daddy everyone was coming and he got a weird look on his face. He knew we were going to meet you soon. He filled the birth pool because we had no idea how long it would be before you arrived. I rested as contractions kept coming every 3 to 5 minutes. Dawn checked in on me several times (her drive was about an hour).
Ben Taylor, James Taylor, Amos Lee, and a few others played  quietly over my phone in the background as I waited to welcome you.  Tavia arrived and got her gear ready and waited as everyone else traveled our way. Daddy had Sawyer get in our bed with Arrow, who began coughing and vomited. So we cleaned that up-luckily the bed had a mattress protector on it in case my water had broken, so clean up was easy. Arrow took a bath and then Sawyer and Arrow got up at this time (way too early)! Ridge slept a long time.  Brandy, then Dawn, arrived, both a bit before Nana. Then everyone was there and waiting. Brandy took mommy's vitals and listen to you-your heartbeat was great. Everyone was resting and quiet and letting me do what I needed. I had started some laundry -- Arrow's mess-  and warmed some breakfast. Daddy made coffee. Contractions stayed about five minutes apart and were getting strong, but manageable because of the break in between. I was eating and drinking as I pleased, and walking around to keep things going. In my mind, if I didn't, contractions might stop and I was annoyed with that possibility. The contractions were worst when I would take a potty break -  intense, activity stopping, toe curling tightenings. Then, five minutes of rest. The team was all working, chatting, snacking in the dining room, allowing me to labor. Dawn checked on you and me often. I remember daddy and I laughing a lot. I took a tiny nap, maybe 10 minutes. About an hour  or so later, Dawn and I talked about an exam to check how things were progressing. I don't like to know this information mentally, but we went ahead with the exam because Dawn knew this about me and didn't tell me my progress / dilation. I knew dad would want to know, and I also knew an exam might speed things a bit.  This was about 9:30 AM, and Dawn just said "it won't be long now, Mama. "  The team begin coming into the living room/birth space, and we all kept waiting. The pool water was added to, because it was a little cool. I had no idea if I'd even know when to get in that pool, but contractions were getting difficult to talk through. I needed daddy to lean on. I started having longer contractions and longer rest times. I remember only smiles and laughter amongst   us all.  I remember Dawn was just smiling and laughing and holding space-I didn't really understand that term completely until I watched it in her. That time period from 9:30  on, and really the whole morning, was/is only a memory of joy for me. Such peace and love and support in the quiet, still, sort of slow morning. Sometime maybe around 1030 I had a contraction strong enough that I said " if this one stops, I'm getting in that water. "So, I did know when to move to the tub! The water brought comfort and relief and I still remember laughing through the rest periods, and wanting to but not being able to during the tightenings. I was leaned over on the pool wall, daddy by my face. I was on hands and knees because I guess I was most comfortable that way at that point. Dawn  and Brandy checked on me and listen to your heartbeat, you were doing well.  I was surrounded by candles and soft music and daddy and a team who was carefully picked by us, and who loved us so well for nine months (and before).  I had prayed for a longer trial of labor and the Lord answered that request as such. Soon, it was time to meet you.

 At 11:09 AM, during a push, my water broke, bringing some short relief. From that point, things were intense and communication with difficult for me. You would be here soon, but for another push or two, I could not feel you descend and I had definite doubts that I'd be able to do this. I knew there was no other option because heck if I was going to move somewhere else  at that point. One more long forever push later, and I knew you were coming. So with everything I had, I pushed as the Lord brought you from my womb to this world. Dawn helped to push you forward in the water, where daddy and I lifted you up and I exclaimed with joy and tears that you were a girl.   I didn't see any of the other faces in the room then, but your daddy was so happy and proud. You cried immediately. You were covered in vernix. You were tiny. The double nuchal cord we saw at 36 weeks that had me worried wasn't even an issue, because no cord it all was wrapped around your neck at birth.  You and I rested in the pool until the placenta was delivered and you had nursed a little and daddy cut your cord. Your temperature was a little low, so Dawn and Brandy gave you to daddy and you had skin to skin time with him while they cared for me and got me to bed. Daddy brought you back to me, we got you warmer. Daddy helped weigh you, and Dawn checked you over and did your beautiful rainbow footprints on your certificate of birth.

 The team cleaned everything up and your brothers met you, and we all snuggled and loved on you and told our team goodbye for the day. Every birth of our babies has been special and sacred and changed our lives. Your birth, our first daughter, into our home, our way , in peace and calm and full of love and laughter, is no exception to this. I will treasure that day in my heart forever. You are smiling in your sleep  on my chest right now, and my heart is so very full of love for you, my tiny pink rainbow baby girl. You are fearfully and wonderfully made by a Father who loves you so very much. He gives such good gifts and we are blessed beyond measure to call you ours. Thank you for giving your mama the opportunity to work so hard for nine months towards a dream. When I learned of my pregnancy with you, a song wasdear to me-the lyrics went "dreams that bear the mark of love are dreams that never die. "After two losses and a long pregnancy full of learning and growth and struggles- HERE YOU ARE.  Welcome to this world, baby Ida Jane. You are so, so very loved.


Courtney Osborne said...

A sweet baby! I am so happy for you all! Congratulations and I pray blessings for Ida and your family.

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