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wife. mom. adjunct professor. we homeschool. i'm a little bit OCD. i love math. bright colors and geometric designs make me drool. we live with a medical rarity, and Jesus saved his life. through that, Jesus is changing us. The american dream and status quo is overrated...and sometimes just plain wrong. our lives, our family, our careers, our faith are all now filtered through a new lens-- thank you Jesus. welcome to our crazy. feel free to take some of it with you, we have plenty to go around.
It's not the load that breaks you down; it's the way you carry it.
-- Lena Horne

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.-- Jesus Christ

Sunday, November 1, 2009


soo.....a few days ago we realized ridge's central line was messing up- separating.  the surgeon came in and said we should just watch it but no reason to fix it until it was completely broken.  mmmm....well....i knew...i KNEW...completely broken was soon on the horizon...but still, no one would fix it.  remember...ridge only has this ONE line now.  so, sure, as i picked ridge up, his line split in two.  half still in his body, the other half on the floor.  we got it clamped so he didn't bleed out....and numerous attempts at an IV have been made.  unsuccessfully.  not because our nurseS haven't tried....ridge is just small and fat and has hard to find veins.  so now, he's been going 2 hours on zero medications.  i'm not writing that using  a happy tone.  i'm so annoyed.  he needs the IV for meds. he also needs an IV for blood bc he was already probably receiving blood today sometime anyway. we need an IV for TWO things.  great.  and we can't get one for ONE thing.  The last time they CUT the octreotide it was within hours that he began having a negative reaction.  Now...we are not on a CUT amt. of octreotide. we are on ZERO.  and just sitting here waiting. YES, our wonderful nurse is trying to get everything lined up to get him a line in...but until everyone she is having to call decides to call her back, we are waiting.  and getting irritated.  i KNOW God knew this was going to happen, i KNOW He is taking care of us all, but i am still as mad as mad can be that i called it earlier this week and NOTHING was done.  How do I get people to believe me that i actually KNOW what is going on with my child?  If we would've fixed this EARLIER IN THE WEEK, we wouldn't be sitting here on SUNDAY when it is hard to get crap like this done!  SERIOUSLY!?!??!  this is a big deal to me bc this is MY child.  please, surgeon...please, prayer is that you could feel, maybe you do, for one second the urgency this is taking in my life right now.  maybe i will begin praying that i could feel for one second how you feel about the situation. because it would be nice to know that i am overreacting.  or it would be nice to know for a fact that this doesn't phase you like it phases me bc it just isn't your child.  either way, it would be nice to know.

so please pray for baby ridge.  pray that his counts would stay somewhat stable in the absence of his medicine but in the presence of God.....and pray that a vein could be located for an IV.  pray that there would be some way we could get the blood AND the meds going.  and pray that as loudly as my voice has been heard up to this point, it would be heard even more CLEARLY from here on out.

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